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Joshamuffin

Why babies cry when they are born.

19 posts in this topic

Here it is in a word document: http://www.box.net/shared/zea54nxil9

This is just something I spontaneously made in meine Freizeit.

Why Babies Cry When They Are Born

A short explanation by Joshamuffin.

When God made humans, he knew there were wicked things that could corrupt them. He gave humans a certain plasticity in childhood that helped develop their brains, but could also corrupt them. God provided a world for humans to acquire souls at birth and live out productive lives. Whenever a human died their soul went to God to be judged. God’s process of judgment is very refined. He learned after his session with the Flagelleramasans that eliminating the gray area is the best way to go. So he took all of the departed souls and deemed them fit or unfit for heaven, which is usually based on the soul-in-question’s sins. If the soul is deemed worthy, it is sent into heaven. If not, it is sent into the first stage of hell.

In the first stage of hell, the soul endures grueling torments and raging fire. After eons on end of this the soul is jammed into a baby, thereby robbing the soul of mind and body, and is born into the second stage of hell. The newborn is delivered unto a planet called Earth. Their crying is a direct result of their experience in the first stage of hell. However, their undeveloped minds eventually forget and call it superstition. This is why children believe in monsters, are afraid of the dark, and other silly things that resemble their suffering in the first stage of hell. On Earth, they carry out new lives with new schools, new friends, and even a new home. They eventually have a new death. The soul is judged for a second time. This is the last chance to make it into heaven. Jesus, who tested Earth for God once, is there this time. Jesus returns to the soul its first mind. The soul will weep, beg, bawl, grovel, sob, plead, and maybe even curl into a fetal position. God then tells them all truths in their entirety, scolds the soul for not getting it the first time, and then asks them a question.

The question is simple, “Do you believe you are worthy to go to heaven?” The soul will eventually answer. God then tells them their fate. They may go into heaven if they are worthy, or they will go into the eternal pits of hell. The eternal pits of hell are the lowest a soul can go. This is where it will spend all eternity in torment.

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I think they cry because they have nothing better to do than to piss me off with their noise.

Unless it was mine, and then it would be beating up other babies and maybe even old people.

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yeah, because babies lungs are filled with fluid before theyre born

"all the time they are in the womb they are breathing fluid, during the miracle of birth this respiration system closes down and the air breathing one kicksin, the first breath of air is painful and hence the cry"

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Yeah thats why babies are slapped when they are born. It clears their airways of the amniotic fluid so they don't suffocate.

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I think crying/screaming is instinct, something we're wired to do when we urgently require something (and aren't sure that someone else will hear) or have no other way of expressing it. If you're dropping off of a building, politely asking for help isn't more effective than screaming in the long run, but I suppose at that point it's a last-ditch thing.

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well think about it babies are probably sleeping or resting peacefully in the womb when all of a sudden they are being pulled out into an unknown place by these unknown things nd they dont no wtf is going on wouldnt u cry 2?

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